Two Fictional Stories

Painting by Alifiya Nagarwala

Caution: These stories may or may not be written when high.

Story 1

Everyday I visit the same moment in my past, although its been ages since I experienced that moment, I cannot get this out of my mind, even today when I am on my death bed, uncertain if I will wake up tomorrow or not.

About 42 years ago, when my eyes could see without glasses, when I could walk without pain and when I could look at myself without disgust, I came across a shining black pebble. The minute I saw, time froze, it was almost as if I had been hypnotized, almost like two lovers in love.

I was able to see my darkest fears reflect in the pebble but I could also see things that fill my heart with peace, I could feel the deepest of pain but also the highest pleasure. I found myself wanting the feeling gone but also craving for it more and more. I felt weak but powerful. I felt an eternity in a heartbeat.

Blissfully the sensation dissolved and I found myself back in by earlier state...state of normalcy? What seemed eternity to me was an experience of only 53 seconds. I ran back home. As soon as I reached, I wanted the pebble again. i went back to the garden to look, but it wasn't anywhere. I vowed to look for it again, but it never enlightened me with its presence again.

Days turned into months and months to years, I married a good man, had the pleasure to raise two beautiful girls and lived and probably even die in this wonderful house, but the explorer within me yearns to to find that pebble, she shouts ‘you will find it’ and that gives me hope, that I will reconnect with what I consider my inner half.

Well, its funny to think how an unexplainable somethings are. I do not know if that pebble was magical, or all this was only dream that only happened in my head. But I do know that some experiences last a life time even if they last only 53 seconds.

Off I go, transiting into my after life, hoping that the pebble makes it to my grave. Everyday i visited this moment in my past, I hope it visits me again....


Story 2


I am not a boy with any extraordinary talents or good looks. I am an average student who doesn’t get into much trouble at school or home. I wear superhero t-shirts and white adidas sneakers like most kids my age. I wear glasses but don’t look too nerdy. I have a good decent built but not as much as the football guys of our school team.

I am a fairly satisfied individual and if you ask me whats missing in my life, I would say a cat would be pretty good addition.

My name is John. Everything about me including my name screams ordinary.
But that was soon going to change...

I woke up on a hot Sunday morning, sat on my bed and poured myself a glass of water. The summer heat had left me so dehydrated that quenching the burning thirst every morning felt like rainfall on a barren land. I drank the glass of water and made my way to the washroom to brush my teeth but I saw a reflection in the mirror, that wasn’t me. It was me but it didn’t look like me.

I had no skin so I could see my own flesh, molten red. I didn’t have any hair, or lips or eyelids, I looked extraordinary but not in the way I would’ve liked! I yelled and I heard someone running up to me. It was my mother but she was green, and her skin was the same texture as a toad. When she spoke to me her voice was the same but her tongue was as long as my leg. She casually asked me what happened as though she wasn’t surprised by what she say. I nodded and said ‘sorry mom, I almost slipped’ she sighed and went back to her chores.

I could not comprehend what was going on. I looked outside my window when somebody grabbed me and took me in a weird shaped vehicle. I screamed for hours during this turbulent journey. Soon the vehicle stopped and my blindfold  was removed. I looked around and saw a world of kittens. The kittens ran towards me, the closer they got, the better I could see them and they were not kittens but baby cheetahs. They rushed towards me- a skinless boy covered in blood red flesh- I ran as fast as I could, away from the blood hungry cheetah cubs. I took a big lunge and rolled back into my bed and the the world behind burst into a bright light that quickly disappeared.

After catching my breath back, I looked at my feet and there was a fresh bite shaped wound - a tiny scar. I looked next to me I saw a glass of water, I looked closer and I saw specs of red particles floating in.
This wasn’t water.

I looked at my scar again and memories came flying to me. I am John. I agreed to be a part of a government experiment that helps individual gets a more realistic feel of their adventurous dreams so that they are able to live ordinary, satisfied and monotonous lives in reality.

Upon the success of this experiment, this treatment will be given to every individual to make them obedient , law abiding citizens. I am not sure if this experiment will be successful or not, because even though we are ‘living our dreams in our dream’ what explains this scar on my foot?

Humans have ventured into a space that they will not be able to return from and I will be the boy who saves humanity from the ultimate doom.

Trigger a Good Thought

We are only humans.

No matter how kind we might consider ourselves to be, we will encounter people in our life that we absolutely detest.

I consider myself to be a good human being.

And yet, I am surprised at how hateful I could be towards a person that I dislike.

I got so consumed with hatred, that I am unable to focus on the things I love.

I am sure you know this feeling. A feeling of intense resentment towards a person to a point where you start wishing ill for them just so they can learn a ‘lesson’.

Until my dear friend, Devyani told me, “Think about yourself first. How is you hating her affecting her? Its not, but it sure is affecting you. So for yourself, quit hating”.

And then it hit me. The world is an amazing place, but unfair things happen all the time and we must be prepared to deal with situations that are not in our favor.

I’m not saying that we shouldn’t dislike people. Because that might be the “right” thing but it’s not the most human thing. However, we can learn to control our emotion.

Trust me, this has been an uncomfortable experience for me and I want to share it because I am sure there are people like me who go through similar stuff….and I want to be a Devyani in their life. Someone who understands how a strong, negative emotion can corrode oneself. Someone who wants to help.

My take on hate- treat it like a passing emotion. It’s impossible to not get these feelings at all. But just as how we cure hunger with food. Cure hate with love. Devote more time to doing things that you love instead of using that energy to think badly of someone.

If you have been wronged, don’t keep victimizing yourself because that will only make you blame the person who has wronged you. And we don’t want to do that because if someone is bad, it’s his/her problem.  Why upset yourself for that?

Solution- Acknowledge. Accept. Move on.

Even as I type this, I feel more and more relieved.

It is challenging but getting rid of negativity will always unburden the mind.

You can’t change anyone. But you can change yourself.

And after I finish typing out the last word of this blog post I make a promise to change the way I feel.

Thank you Devyani for triggering this feeling.

Train Time Lovers

GAY- a term more often used to derogate a straight man than to actually describe a homosexual.

It has become such an ingrained part of our vocabulary to use ‘gay’ in synonym of ‘stupid’ that at the back of our head we have formed a notion that being gay is something to be looked down upon.

I for one am a greater supporter of LGBT, or I would say, I am a great supporter of ANY sort of expression of love. I believe it’s a luxury for everybody, irrespective of his/her gender or class.

India is definitely progressing when it comes to being sensitive towards this issue. But the progress is restricted to a very small percentage of the population-the rich or the educated.

There is a large population who think it’s just UNNATURAL or ABNORMAL to be gay.

Every Sunday I take the train from Grant Road to Santa Cruz Station for my class. Since it’s a holiday for most people, I quite enjoy the ride as there are hardly any people in the compartment and so its not cramped like it is on working days.

I sat on the window seat, put my earphones on and looked outside.

I felt an elbow touch my neck, so instinctively I turned around and responded ‘pccch’. 

I thought for a moment that it’s a man trying to bother me. But when I turned around I saw that the man was actually putting his arm around another man and in the process he elbowed me. My reaction made him and his friend switch to the opposite seat. I felt guilty for reacting that way.

As an Indian girl, by default, I identify men from underprivileged background as lecherous. The sort of incidents that happen with girls in India just makes you think in a certain way.

My back was turned towards the two men. I just looked behind to see if they had taken any offense to my behavior. But for them, nothing seemed to matter. The taller man had wrapped one arm around the shorter man and held his hand with the second arm.  They were looking into each other eyes and blushing and talking.

I quickly turned back into my position because I didn’t want to look too creepy or intrusive.

I turned towards them again, and saw that the one of them had put his head of the other ones shoulder. It was very sweet and romantic the way they were with each other.

The train stopped at the next station, and more people hopped it. I took this opportunity to change my seat so that I could face them. I enjoyed looking at them. It made me feel happy.

But there were others in the train that were frowning at them. That level of intimacy disgusted other men. I guess both of them got the hint, because the next station they got down and went and sat in the luggage compartment, hand in hand.

Gay men that are represented in media are often from the fashion industry. There is hardly any representation of lower class gay men, which is what made me observe them so carefully.

It’s so strange that something like domestic violence that isn’t normal, is naturalized in our society, and yet something that is natural isn’t normalized.

I am glad that I saw them. It only reinforced my belief that LOVE IS LOVE.

Taxi Driver

A large portion of my pocket money goes into travelling. Since there is no train station close to where I live, most of my commuting is done by cab. Uber/Ola, yes but mostly the classic Kaali Peeli.
I am a very talkative person, so if I am alone in the taxi, I sit in front and make conversation with the driver uncle. I find no shame in doing so. I say this because I have noticed that privileged people look down upon those who they think don't have a white collar job. People are so rude to drivers and maids just because they live a different lifestyle.
What really shocks me is that the people who are so impolite with drivers and maids are young students who aren't   really making any money of their own but are discriminating on those basis. In a country like India, the only difference between a beggar child and us is the house we were born into. Besides that, we are born equal and should be treated and treat others with the same level of dignity and respect.
Today the Taxi Driver who dropped me home  was an interesting man. He was wearing these cool sunglasses and playing the latest songs. I asked him if he was playing the music from the radio or mobile. He said mobile. Then I asked if he could turn up the volume, and he said that I can hold his phone close to my ear and enjoy the music. I thought that was very considerate of him, because most taxi drivers just want to take you from point A to point B, but this guy wanted me to enjoy my ride. And I did. All through marine drive I sang along and let the breeze massage my face. In the middle he got a call from the man who had rented out his taxi from. He said 'I am driving right now, I will call you in 10 mins... or wait, you call me 10 mins because I don't have balance'. Then he turned around and handed me the phone again and said 'These guys want to argue on the phone every time they call, so why waste balance'. I laughed and agreed. Its true, We spend too much time and energy on people who don't add value to our life. I for one, keep thinking about incidents that have hurt my feelings over and over again. Why should I waste my 'balance' on things that don't help me or make me feel good?

I have a problem with right and left. It takes me a while to figure out whats right and whats left. So I always wear a rubber band on my right wrist so I knownthats the right side.l. But since I was in the taxi with an open window, I used the rubber band to tie my hair. When we entered the lane for my house, I told him to take a left turn instead of right. And then when he did take a left turn, I immediately said 'Sorry Uncle, right'. I do this a lot. I make these mistakes all the time. Usually the drivers make an irritated 'pcccch' sound or crib. But this one, just smiled at my stupidity and took the right turn. While getting out he asked me if college admissions had started (since college is where I took the cab from).I told him they have and asked him who was he asking for. He proudly told me that his daughter scored a 95% and wanted to take admission in Jai Hind College. I congratulated him, paid him ₹104 for the ride and said thanks. He smiled with his cool sunglasses. I was waiting for the lift but I could hear him talk (rather argue) on the phone to the guy who had called earlier.


I like meeting people who are polite and kind. I hate to add this negative connotation to the blog but I come across so many people who thoughtlessly pass rude comments or hurt other's feelings just to feel superior about themselves. Its frustrating to see people who so self absorbed that they fail to pay attention to the way they make others feel around them. I am sure I have done that and others have to. But if you're reading this, consciously try and not make someone feel bad about themselves. Its not the big things that matter, but the small acts of kindness that mean something big to someone. Be this Taxi Driver in someone's life and be the reason they enjoy their journey of life.

This Experience Was Priceless

I went to Japan over the summers.  If I were to ever make a list of my top 10 best memories, 8 of them would be the ones that I made during this trip, which is why it wouldn’t be fair to not write a blog post about it.

Japan is an interesting place. It has amazing transportation service, good food, and fun places to visit like Dog and Cat cafes. Most people in Japan don’t know English so it’s funny to communicate with them. However, for some reason that too adds to the experience of living in a foreign country. But the best thing about Japan was Dhanisha.

It doesn’t matter where you go, it matters who you go with and I was lucky enough to have the company of my two best friends.   The first thing that pops in my head when I hear about 3 friends going somewhere is the movie Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara. Even though our trip didn’t involve scuba diving or sky diving, it was equally fun.

You know when you’re in the company of good people; you thrive to be a better person yourself. You want to be a better person so you can offer that goodness to others. At so many points in the trip I just admired how my friends are and wanted to be a better person myself so I can give back the happiness, the respect, the laughter that they kept giving.

When you have 20 days with the your close friends, you end up talking about things that you otherwise wouldn’t. For example, our fears, everyone has but most of us are in denial of them. We do not want to share or talk about our fears because they are vulnerable subjects. But when you finally talk about it, it frees you. I fear being a negative person. To make this more precise, I feel like I always put people down. Many things that I say I feel like I make others feel inferior and make myself look superior. I don’t intentionally want to make anyone feel like that, but yet everything I say speaks otherwise. Sharing this problem did two things:

)         1)Made me accept I have a problem

       2)Work towards changing it

 Most of the people in Japan travel in trains. Trains are very convenient there, it goes to every place. And the stations are so quiet. People don’t make a lot of noise. In fact, there is hardly any chatter in the trains too.

The days we would come back late home, we would stop at a Family Mart and I would buy these amazing noodles. I am sure they are the reason why I have gained three and a half kgs of weight. In the night when it gets chilly, I would be eating noodles with chopsticks that I don’t know how to use and catching up on speed with Dhanisha and Khushboo. Those noodles were made by God himself.

The longer I stayed in this place, the fonder I grew of it. I would love to wake up next to my friends. Everyday was a new day to do something crazy.

Ill be forever grateful for this, to my parents for giving me the best birthday gift, to Dhanisha’s parents and to Khushboo and Dhanisha. This experience was priceless.

Excuse Me, While I Play The Cranky Feminist

Women have always belonged to someone else in the sense that they don’t have an identity of their own. They are someone’s wife, someone’s mother or someone’s daughter, as if their very existence depends upon the relationship they share with a man. While men rarely define themselves relationally.

Even now, there are traditions that favor men over women. The one that bothers me is the surname change. Why is it that the woman has to give up her surname and take up her husband’s? Why is it that a woman is not equally responsible to continue the family legacy as a man is? It is the sexist culture that demands the surname change to happen after a woman is married.

I get it that when two people fall in love and decide to get married, thinking about changing your last name is not a concern. But your name is your identity and giving a part of it up is like diluting it in a way.

The reason many women don’t object to this is because they still think that men hold a higher position than them. Which is why I see so many girls aged eighteen giving up education and getting married. The very idea of a female giving up her education shows that our society has a long way to go to achieve equality. Because for a fact, I know there many humans out there who still pray they don’t have a female child and who think that the best they can do for their daughters is to get them married off so early that they spend the rest of their life in servitude.

I agree that many girls want to get married right from the age of fifteen, but wanting to be financially dependent on someone for the rest of your life just shows that our society is doing something wrong to give rise to such patriarchal thinking.

 It is hard to expect a man to have an objection to this because they enjoy their privileged position but women need to take a stand instead of just getting carried away into this male-dominated world.

As long as the inequality of the sexes continues, so will rape, so will dowry and so will other forms of violence against women.

TAKE A STAND.